I wouldn't call it optimism...

So, maybe I was being an asshole earlier. I do that sometimes. No, I still love Smoltzy. And obviously, he's not a traitor. Maybe he's the oppoisite-which would be a patriot? A Braves patriot? I mean, he got rocked by the Nats, who are the worst team I've seen in a long time. Willie Harris is on that team, though. That dude is fierce. But, the Nats are awful. So, maybe Smoltzy was sabotaging the Sox? It would be sweet if he did.

But, I'm not here to talk about the Bravos anymore. I'm here to discuss optimism, and why it has never been a part of my character. I am naturally self depricating, I'm hard on myself. I'm hard on everybody. That, as the kids say, is how I roll. But, damnit, I'm tired of looking at the downside to everything. I will always see the downside, I'm too damn discerning not too, but maybe I'll try to ignore it. Tough task. But I will try to look past the girls I see that do nothing but take pictures of themselves all night. Seriously, all night. I was trying to load out from the show tonight, and I was dodging digital flashes and poses, like walking through a maze. I will hold my tongue when I hear people talking about how they just got off tour, and a minute later realize that they aren't actually in a band, they just went to 6 Widespread Shows in a row. I will just turn the other cheek when people discuss dicussing the finer points of commercial hip-hop, and I won't say hip-hop in general, but sort of hip-hop in general. Because honestly, what's the point? Who cares what I think? It is self indulgent enough for me to write on this blog...but the truth is, even though its out there for the world to see, I am just venting for myself. Self indulgence. I mean, if someone else wants to waste there time with my ideas, hey, your minutes, pal. But seriously, thanks for stopping by...
But how do I control it? How do I stop the cynicism when people text non-stop during live music? Or, I lose a bar gig to "Guitar Hero."(True.) Or, "Guitar Hero" in general? I don't know-I guess the slow eating of my soul won't go away. But, the world definitely does not need anymore negativity, so maybe I can at least keep my mouth shut. Spare us all...

Digression. Again. Instead of focusing on the negative-how about the Positive...How about finding a good parking space when I really needed one because it was pouring rain and tonight I didn't want to have walk a lot of blocks...
How about playing songs and getting paid-most of them aren't my songs, and it is sad that "Wagon Wheel" has lost any of the soul that it used to have, because at one time, I really liked that song. Now it might as well be Jessie's Girl. But still, I have a job playing mostly other people songs and I'm working on a career where I can play mostly my songs and folks will be happy...

I don't know why it tends to be half empty for me. It has never been my intention, it is just the way it has always been. Like being left handed, or something. I'm trying. We'll see-I've tried parallel parking for years, and I still do a shit job of it. Time will tell. But sometimes it doesn't. I'm not drunk, but I've been drinking. Don't feel like proof reading.